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Grateful: Yes, I am!

Being alive*! Isn’t it? Waking early, and jogging in the morning freshness: I find it most interesting that I still have chance to correct my mess. I still can be sorry to those whom ‘ I may have hurt! ‘(We all know, a lot has happened;in past)

Having mother*, who every damn time, yells me to take shower, and eat on time;to avoid bad health. And father*, who worries more about their daughter’s future than his own!

#family

I can fill my stomach, and sleep comfortably*: when there are many who lacks it, not by choice but ‘not having a choice’. I find it blessed to have these.

My country is safe, and world is at safest*! It matters a lot, when others are happy, only then, you can be at ease.

Hope*. This is the most ‘beautiful‘ thing to have, in this ‘wonderful’ world. It is said it’s never too late! ;

How can five or six things consolidate your feelings? you are grateful about! Even writing this wordpress blog, I feel gratitude.

I don’t know if you have heard or not, but there is kutti Story song from Master movie a Tamil song sung by Thalapathy Vijay and Anirudh Ravichander, talks about momentariness like…

“…Life is very short nanba, Always be happy…. “

Be happy, Be grateful!
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Last time I left my comfort zone.

Come on! I am not ultra human. I have my flaws as well. Just like many others I love having coffee on bed, watching n number of korean Or Turkish series! Yeah I love binge watching.

I dare not, organising my table; leave alone cleaning room. I have to hear mother yelling for messy clothes( Indian mothers are very emotional regarding daughters and their ‘ should be’ ‘ good habits‘.

In college days, I would scroll down wikipedia page to know a bit here and there, it was good enough to pass midterm semester exam.

If I define comfort zone: then it would be doing exactly nothing what others want me to do.

But it changed, my threshold of zone, needed breach of it’s limit. I was in existential crisis.

I was twenty-three:jobless, friends and others of my age, few of them were earning; others already had a future plan working; me, I had marriage pressure as well, what if I don’t find a good job before twenty-five;then I would have to be get married with anyone. Ah! The donkey dowry system.

In such situation, where there is a well behind you, and Cobra ahead of you; what would you do?

Exactly, then there is no rest, leave comfort and ZONE thing.

I had few entrance exams, into three phases, each phase having 0.1% or less success rate. I was afraid whether I would make or not? But i didn’t had a choice, I already had, 3 years gap after my graduation. There was no returning back, besides there were many criticising fingers, mocking my whole thing.

I wrote a line of Bhagwad Gita, nishkama karma; and that become my moto, I studied and studied, like never in past 5-6 years. I hated that, I cried a lot. I blamed God, destiny, bad luck, and what not! But I studied, I used to wake up early, and go to bed at midnight, every single mono day.

Library seat

I never once went outside my house, I quit social media accounts; in one line: I did all I could do in those time;

Results?

Well I passed written exam, but didn’t appear for physical phase, I had health issues.

I have another attempt upcomig in 2022, few months left. I haven’t started yet, I have fear in my mind, but again no choice.

I realised, we don’t know our potential until we break our limit. We can never possibly understand what can be done? Just by putting a dashbord with a sign:

Don’t disturb: I am in my COMFORT ZONE!

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